Take the Quiz! - Scott Johnson Author

Which story from "Essays Out of Left Field" fits your (assumingly very normal) personality? Take this quick quiz and I'll match you with a FREE essay from my award-eligible book!

What's your idea of a "fun" weekend activity? Whatever soccer tournament, concert, play date, recital my kid has scheduled Helping to bring awareness to paraplegic orphan kittens with lupus paying to be incredibly uncomfortable yet earning a half a banana for my efforts. Where did I put my glasses?

How do you react when something doesn’t go as planned? Who has time for "plans" anyway? I take it as an opportunity for a spontaneous naked protest. Hey, not every race is a P.R. Naps. Highly recommend. 10 out of 10

What's your favorite song? Kids Bop Volume 37 "Free Fallin’" by Tom Petty "Born to Run" by Bruce Springsteen "Forever Young" by Rod Stewart

What’s the most important factor when choosing a new hobby? You mean like which hobby my child will choose this week? The environmental footprint of said hobby. Can I but new shoes for it? Can I do it sitting down? Or better yet, while lying down...asleep?

What’s your approach to physical fitness? I'm in if there are snacks at the end. Anything to celebrate the human body in its most natural form. Must include pain, suffering and chaffing or it doesn't count Shuffleboard.

How do you feel about your age? I feel old, but I watch cartoons every day. Age is just a number. And that number is “naked bike ride” for some reason. It's all relative, according to what my age group category is Wait...what am I doing here? Is this a quiz or something?

What's your perfect vacation? Adults only inclusive resort or even a mall parking lot if you can promise there will be no kids there A nude beach. Whether it's a legal nude beach is irrelavent destination 5k charity run A warm place where my joints won't creak.

Which Essay is Right for You?

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