Hello – I am Scott Johnson. I am an author (7%), speaker (1.4%), influencer (0.1%) and Norwegian (72%). Don’t get caught up on the fact those don’t add to 100%. I am also a Dad, husband, Data Systems Administrator, and owner of a 2011 Ford F-150.

I write romantic fiction, primarily through the lens of female protagonists searching for a second chance at love and creative inspiration. I gravitate toward rustic, central Italian settings where romance and fine wine are seemingly interwoven into every aspect of life.

Just kidding! I just explained the the plot to “Under the Tuscan Sun” — originally a novel/memoire turned movie, staring the lovely Diane Lane. No, no, no, that certainly does not represent my true writing style! I prefer writing romance novels set in the South of France. You know, croissants and stuff.

Just kidding again. I write humorous and sometimes inspirational essays about life as a middle-aged, sports-fanatic Dad from the Midwest. If you don’t find my essays humorous or inspirational, then just consider them regular essays.

My writing journey began in 2001 when I wrote my first annual Christmas letter to family and friends.  Each year thereafter I summarized my year through that letter and distributed it to tens of readers. I entertained those readers through well-crafted jokes and whimsical anecdotes. All while delivering critical information those readers needed to know – like personality quirks of our cats or details about a recent road trip to Des Moines. My annual letter grew in popularity and my readership exploded from tens of readers to DOZENS of readers.

As my storytelling confidence grew, I decided to take my act to the public. I performed a 10 minute stand-up comedy routine at a local open mic night. My creative and thought-provoking performance earned me a prize of a free beer! (All entrants received a free beer.)

That innovative open mic set and legendary Christmas letter exploits caught the attention of the editors of vitalbypoet.com magazine. (It also caught their attention because I worked there.) In a show of questionable judgement, the Vital magazine staff invited me to write the back page column for their quarterly magazine. Since 2016, I’ve shared personal essays about being a terrible farm kid, the joys of shoveling snow, running a half marathon and rescuing a duckling from an evil snapping turtle. Those essays led to my first published book: Essays Out of Left Field. You should probably buy it.

Besides all that stuff, my lovely wife Hiedi (yes, I spelled that correctly) and I have 3 wonderful/talented/funny/smart/etc kids — Aliyah, Annabelle and Brooks. We also have 2 dogs, 2 cats and a fancy set of dishes we got for our wedding but still have never used.

…Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you wanted the LONG version of “About Me”!